Not Just a Granny

Living in the countryside you expect to have the odd mouse or two scurrying about the place causing mischief and mayhem as they look for stray morsels carelessly abandoned.

I was warned by the outgoing carer that there was a bit of a mouse ‘problem’ and to be sure to not leave food in any form out the cupboards during the night, and that I would have to clean all the cupboard tops in the morning.

This has proved to be true. Who knew mice could poop so much!!

I’ve even seen a wee flash from the corner of my eye while watching TV and on one occasion spotted a teeny tiny little body hiding behind a leg of the table….I saw you!!! 🧐🧐

But on the whole they’ve not bothered me, and I’m not really bothered by them 🐀🐀🐀🐀 and think they’re quite cute..beyond the pooping of course.

Until last night…..🤨🤨🤨🤨

I’ve been here a WHOLE WEEK and brought a few treats with me in my suitcase, which until now have gone unnoticed by the mice.

But yesterday we had a Tesco home delivery and one of the items was a packet of crisps; may I add ‘of the cheddar cheese and red onion flavour ‘. The cheese part should have been a red flag…🚩

I put said packet of crisps in the drawer of the bureau in my room so as to not to tempt said 🐀🐀 I’m not sure why I thought they’d be safe there. 🤔🤔

During the night I heard the unmistakable sound of a packet rustling. You little bastards…!!! You’re not going to eat my crisps!!

So I jumped out of bed and removed the crisps from the drawer and put it in my suitcase…and neglected to zip the suitcase….I blame nighttime brain fog!!

Not long after settling back to sleep I was once again roused from my uneasy slumber by the rustling crickle crackle of paper….even though I could tell it tried to be quiet. I listened carefully to determine the source, and realising it was coming from my suitcase I jumped out of bed and gave the suitcase a solid thwack then lifted the lid, and had the satisfaction of hearing a small body bounce against the radiator as it jumped, terrified, out my suitcase and into the radiator. Got ya, you little rascal.

I zipped up the suitcase and back to bed.

At this stage I was annoyed, but still amused….but not for long.

No sooner had I settled back to sleep than I could hear the sound of gnawing!! Wtf. Guys no!! Get out. So I switched on the bedside lamp and peered over the end of the bed towards my suitcase, and there, for all the world, innocence personified, were two little mice…sitting on my suitcase looking totally confused….’who put the lights on?’….

Oh gosh they are ever so cute and ever so tiny. 🤭🤭

However, cute or not, my slippers soon flew through the air, a wasted effort really since I can’t throw straight anyway, but it did the trick and I could hear the sound of bewildered scurrying behind the dresser.

Right, you wee critters. Out. Before you lose your heads!! 🪓🪓😳😳☠☠

I lifted the suitcase onto its wheels, checked it was securely zipped and back to 🛏 🥱🥱🥱😴😴

Whether they visited again or not, I really don’t know, since by then I was exhausted and fell into a deep sleep. I’m pretty sure they snuck back “oh look, she’s sleeping ” as they tiptoed across the capet to try and gnaw their way through the suitcase to get at my crisps. 😠😠😠

No further disturbances and I slept.

On investigating this morning and checking to see if they’d used the 🚽 in my suitcase, I discovered that in fact the wee devils had gnawed through the netting of the inner pocket and attacked my gingerbread Santa 😱😱😭😭😭 I was saving that you little munchers.

So I guess that Santa is going to lose his head today. And the rest of him will be eaten today at 4pm teatime….by ME!!! And not those two bad mice 😁😁🐀🐀 Not sure why I was saving it anyway, except that it was in my xmas stocking and I get sentimental about stuff like that!🤪🤪🎄🤶🏻

As for the crisps, they didn’t even look at those!! 🧀🧀 or not, they were rejected in favour of 🍚 and spice, and all things nice. Cheeky little meeses.

Seeing those teeny tiny bodies sitting on my suitcase last night I wished I’d had my camera to hand, I would have loved to get a pic of them ☺☺ And seeing them reminded me of many years ago when I worked at a B&B in Greyton in the Cape, South Africa. It was called The Posthouse (original incarnation) and subsequently turned into a b&b. There were 12 rooms across from the main building and they were all named after Beatrix Potter characters…Benjamin Rabbit, Jemima Puddleduck, Jeremy Fisher, etc and the honeymoon suite was called…you guessed it- ‘Two Bad Mice’ 😄😄😍😍

That was one of the best jobs I had in my entire life, although it came at the tail-end (unavoidable pun 😆😆) of a very bad period in my life.

And so this morning while I was bleary eyed and thinking about those little blighters waking me up….I thought about The Posthouse. It’s funny how memories work.

And I realise I could have told the whole story in xi words: “two mice got into my suitcase and ate my gingerbread santa” but where’s the fun in that?? 🤪🤪🤪 andddd if you’ve read this far, bravo 😁😁👏👏

Oh, and p.s. please read “who put the lights on?” to the tune of “who let the dogs out?”🎶🎶🎵😁😁

In other news, my booking has been extended by 3 weeks, so I’ll be here till 8th February. It’s going to be a challenge to find new routes to walk, but st least I won’t be distracted by different scenery and stopping to take photos. I can just put my head down and push up the kms.

And we may get snow ❄❄❄❄ now that would be awesome.

And in case you were wondering…

The Tale of Two Bad Mice is a children’s book written and illustrated by Beatrix Potter, and published by Frederick Warne & Co. in September 1904. Potter took inspiration for the tale from two mice caught in a cage-trap in her cousin’s home and a doll’s house being constructed by her editor and publisher Norman Warne as a Christmas gift for his niece Winifred. While the tale was being developed, Potter and Warne fell in love and became engaged, much to the annoyance of Potter’s parents, who were grooming their daughter to be a permanent resident and housekeeper in their London home.
The tale is about two mice who vandalize a doll’s house. After finding the food on the dining room table made of plaster, they smash the dishes, throw the doll clothing out the window, tear the bolster, and carry off a number of articles to their mouse-hole. When the little girl who owns the doll’s house discovers the destruction, she positions a policeman doll outside the front door to ward off any future depredation. The two mice atone for their crime spree by putting a crooked sixpence in the doll’s stocking on Christmas Eve and sweeping the house every morning with a dust-pan and broom. Ref wikipedia with thanks as always.

And yes, I have most of the Beatrix Potter books….and when he’s older, I’ll read them to my grandson when he visits me in my new place. Of which I coincidentally take occupation on 8th February 🙃🙃